Just being honest. I am frustrated. The stupid scale and those darn numbers got to me and I broke down. Not in a healthy way… but in a run (drive) to the market and buy all the cookies kind of way. I have issues, I know.
I don’t know why I do this. Almost to add insult to injury perhaps? Maybe because I feel that I have done everything right… when I self sabotage then I can use my cookie binge as an excuse as to why things aren’t going according to my plan.
The past few weeks I have been faithfully recording my nutrition on myfitnesspal, moving daily, and adding strength to my fitness routine. I have been doing all the right things.
I was feeling stronger, lifting more, running further, running faster, and really feeling successful… that is until I stepped on that scale and had my trainer tell me that I had NO CHANGE. Nothing. Nada. Zilch.
No weight lost. No fat lost. No muscle gained.
I was (and am) frustrated. I cried… yes, in front of a grown man I shed tears (he was very uncomfortable). It is frustrating and dog gone SO confusing!
This whole getting healthier, fitter and losing weight thing isn’t just a calories in calories out formula. Well.. maybe for me it isn’t. There are so many things to factor into the equation: sleep, stress (oh the stress), hormones, dietary needs, metabolism and so much more.
So as I sat and inhaled too many cookies last night, amidst frustrating sobs, similar to Cookie Monster…
… I realized that I need to continue on this journey. To not give up. I have lost the weight before, I know what to do… I just need to keep doing it.
I finished my cookie (because this girl doesn’t like to waste food), and sighed with contentment.
My clothes are fitting the same.
I am lifting heavier weight.
I am running further distances.
I am finding my speed with running is slowly returning.
The numberS on the scale might not be my friend today… or EVER honestly. I have to realize that I am on my own personal journey. My journey is not the same as yours. We all have our struggles and successes. God made our bodies uniquely different… and it is up to each of us to find out what works best for us. I am on a journey to find out what works best for me: running, strength, nutrition (and portion control with those darn cookies), and more!
I am choosing to focus on what my body can do rather than let the scale define me. Focusing on those non-scale victories: clothes fitting (getting looser), lifting more weight, running longer, running faster, feeling healthier with more energy, and more!
The scale and all those numbers are only one part of the equation… I know this… you know this. We just need to remember it.
So as I hide those delicious chocolate chip cookies, I am reminded that I am strong. I am healthy. I am worthy of my success. I won’t let the frustrating number on the scale set me back on my goals.
Kerri Olkjer says
Oh girl, I have so been there. HUGS!
Angela @ Happy Fit Mama says
That’s soooo tough when you feel you are doing everything possibly right. But like you pointed out – you are making huge gains in other ways. Maybe you need to just step away from the scale if that’s the source of your frustrations? Go by how your clothes feel, how strong you feel,etc. The weight is really just a number.
Rebecca @ Strength and Sunshine says
The numbers on the scale are no one’s friend. DON’T LOOK AT THEM! They tell you nothing but gravity’s effect on the body. Don’t give-up my dear friend! Just keep focusing on you success and healthy lifestyle. Lifting, running, eating good nourishing food. Remember to laugh and smile and love the fact that you are healthy enough to be LIVING!
Heather says
First time commenter here! Thank you so much for sharing. It’s so therapeutic to put our disappointments and hopes in writing. You are doing so well and have many admirers here, myself included!
lindsay says
that is tough. But sometimes our body clings to adipose tissue if it’s in a stress mode. Maybe that is you. give it time and try not to feel discouraged. you’re doing great!
Shannon says
Throw the scale away Rachel! Don’t let the guilt get to you. You are strong active and beautiful! Keep on keeping on!
Sam @ PancakeWarriors says
You have the right mindset chick! I think when you start being kind to yourself and really loving the improvements you are making outside of the weightloss, your body finally follows through. I have had an all.the.cookies moment so many times. LoL luckily I know better than to let those little set backs make me fall into a full downward spiral. Best of luck!
Patty @ Reach Your Peak says
Wow I feel you 4378574895743%. I’ve been going through this the past few months. During half marathon training I gained weight. And I feel gross about myself. I wrote a very similar post about telling yourself how despite the numbers, our bodies are doing amazing things (lifting heavier, running longer). AND cookies are my go-to as well. When I feel like crap I’m like you know what, whatever I’m eating cookies. Might as well. I’ll restart tomorrow maybe. I’ve gone through a whole pack of Milano cookies recently. It’s tough. It feels impossible to lose weight. It’s so easy to gain and so hard to lose. I don’t feel like the numbers are budging at all and that’s what is frustrating but I also know I need to be better with nutrition. We got this!!
katie says
Your focus is right now..focus on how amazing your body is and what it CAN do. I’ve found that when I stop focusing on it, it becomes easier. I’m obsessive like that.
Hang in there…You’re beautiful and amazing and inspiring.
RFC says
Oh honey, *hugs*!!! As a trainer, it is equally as confusing and frustrating for us as well sometimes. I had a client once who busted her ASS non stop. I wouldn’t let her do follow up measurements for 2 full months, because I *KNEW* we would see change. She actually gained weight and her body fat stayed the same. I was shocked. She was devastated, and I pointed out the exact same things: she was lifting 3x as much as when she first started, she was doing exercises she couldn’t do two months ago, and her range of motion (she’s in her 50’s) had GREATLY improved. But it seems we base SO much on the scale in our society. IN the end, she did eventually start to lose, it just took her body a while to adjust to the new routine. Hang in there mama. YOU are STRONG and you are doing the right thing, the rest will fall into place in time!
Abby @ BackAtSquareZero says
Oh the number of times I have been upset by the scale or lack of progress and it has lead to a binge. So frustrating not to be seeing the results. I wish i had a magic answer, I don’t – if you figure it out let me know, but just keep moving forward and know it happens to us all.
Lynda@fitnessmomwinecountry says
Miss Rachel, I have met you in person. You are so darn cute and beautiful all wrapped up in one package. I was and still am very inspired by you. I ran a half marathon with you. You were my muse. I am short {you know} and I hear you. I have my own issues with my sausage legs, but we are amazing and healthy women. You are so fabulous. Eat those darn cookies, have some chocolate and just be healthy all together.
I remind my self all the time to just accept {or try to} accept my body and do my thing each day with passion and enjoy it, not do it to think of numbers on scales or my weight. 🙂
Sue @ This Mama Runs for Cupcakes says
I’m with you. I frequently feel this way, I feel like I’m doing everything right and don’t see any results and then I go and just splurge to drown my sorrows and it’s a vicious cycle and hard to get out of. I started to see a nutritionist and see him every week and he has helped me get back on track….a little. It’s always a work in progress! Stick with it and don’t get down on yourself, you will get there!