Few things in the world are more powerful than a positive push. A smile. A word of optimism and hope. A “you can do it” when things are tough. ~Richard M. De Vos
There is nothing more important or as simple as giving our children generous doses of encouraging words. It costs us so little in time and effort, but the rewards are priceless.
Did you know that for every negative comment a person receives, they need to hear ten positive comments to overcome the effects of that negative one! I know that I have had days where I should have been spouting off more than ten positive comments to reaffirm my adoration for my children.
Encourage means to put courage into, to give strength. We have the responsibility each day to give strength and courage to our children to help them face life’s opportunities and challenges.
Our kind words and encouragement have a powerful effect in our children’s lives. Proverbs 12:25 says “An anxious heart weighs a man down, but a kind word cheers him up.” I plan on doing alot of cheering!! You?
Be on the look out
There are days when I feel like my children must think I am constantly on them with correcting their actions or conversations. Sometimes it is easier to find and focus on our kids mistakes rather than to be attentive to what they are doing right. Our challenge as positive moms is to identify our children’s positive attributes and actions and encourage them in those things.
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Pay close attention to our children’s interests.
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Become available to our children.
Spend quantity as well as quality time with our children.
Set a goal to say atleast three encouraging comments to your children for atleast twenty-one consecutive days.
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Be Specific ~ Use a personalized praise to let our children know that we are really paying attention. Children recognize our sincerity when we use specific details to describe the qualities we appreciate about them.
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Be Prepared ~ It never hurts to be prepared. You can always have a pre-positive comment planned to use for when the time is just right. For example, ” God made you special, I am so glad he made you a part of this family!” or “I love spending time with you! You are a bright spot in my day!”
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Be Creative ~ Variety is the spice of life, even when it comes to speaking positive words!
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Be Resourceful ~ Use other resources to help enforce positive comments, behavior and words – the Bible has excellent resources!!
When we pay attention to our children, and recognize (and celebrate) their positive choices they will want to continue with that behavior. Too often I find that children (perhaps just mine!?) act out with poor choices when Mommy is not paying them any attention. In their mind, negative attention IS attention… and that is better than NO attention. However, that is not fun for anyone involved… and it doesn’t help the positive mommy vibe either! 🙂
We as mothers hold the key. There is no better stimulus to motivate our children toward goodness than the knowledge tha ttheir best qualitis are noticed and appreciated by mom.
Read Ephesians 4:29-32; Colossians 3:12-15; and Philippians 4:8. Reflect on these verses and how it can help you become a better encourager to your children.
Write out four specific positive comments for each of your family members and deliver one of them each for the next four weeks. (Remember it takes 21 days to establish a habit – make positive encouraging comments a healthy habit!).
Cailin @ Stir Crazy says
What a great post, and oh so true!
“Too often I find that children (perhaps just mine!?) act out with poor choices when Mommy is not paying them any attention.” –> This is not just your kids 😉 My little guy is the same way if I’m not paying enough attention.
Thanks for these reminders. Positive reinforcement and encouragement is so important!
Janice - Fitness Cheerleader says
Thanks for the reminder Rachel! I had a horrible afternoon with the kids and I sure could have used this advice – I’ll keep it in mind for tomorrow, as I strive to start the day off on a much better foot.